A wandering monk walked barefoot everywhere he went, to the point that the soles of his feet eventually became quite thick and leathery. And because he ate very little, he gradually became very frail. Several days often passed between opportunities to brush his teeth, so he usually had bad breath. Therefore, throughout the region, he came to be known as the super-calloused fragile mystic plagued with halitosis.
What do monks get when the laundry machine breaks down?
A certain monastery was home to monks who had vowed, not the usual vow of silence, but one of plainchant. They communicated only in Gregorian tones. Each morning, they assembled in the chapel and the Abbot would chant"Good morning assembled brethren." The monks dutifully replied "Good morning, Father Abbot." One morning, an irreverent reverend (a mocking monk) instead chanted "Good evening, Father Abbot". The Abbot fixed them all with a steely-eyed gaze ... and sang "Someone chanted evening!"